Yo, Jimbo

love is warmth.
i am cold.
cold as fuck, cold.
colder than cold, cold.
cold as sub zero and mister freeze cuddling in anarctica, cold.
cold as fucking ice, thank you foreigner, cold.
cold as shit.
so damn cold.

* * * * *


i walk a bed of nails on a path to self-discovery/
with shame and stigmata locked in filibustering/
mustering all that i can but still flustering/
and talkin on courage like i actually know a fuckin thing/
i'm having a crisis of identity/

the greatest of my enemies is chemical depency/
i drink olde english cause i can't afford hennesy/
i mean it when i say that it'll probably be the end of me/
the inner me's energy is feelin' sorta menacing/
i need to find a release from the demons that are surfacing/
worse is the thirst and i treat it with an urgency/
my liver screamin every night "james, why you hurtin me"?/
workin the epitome of dirge plus emergency/
see?/
i'm having a crisis of identity/

god's a 40 oz drink so i work 40+ a week/
as i hop from check to check and chug church on the sneak/
and you might find it weak that i indulge in the bleak/
and crack the bones in my cheeks every time i try to speak/
i'm having a crisis of identity/

i cant tell ya that i know myself and keep a straight face/
because the last time i knew myself was in the 8th grade/
i identify my failures and name each mistake/
scribble shit on paper cause it's therapy with taste/
i'm having a crisis of identity/

i use my words to weave intricate imagery/
with mystery, entropy, and intimacy/
but sometimes my thoughts are too demented to see/
and if you saw what i see you'd be demented as me/
(see some say i'm possessed by demons/
but i'm really just dreamin/
of a day when yall see what im seein/
not tryin to sound arrogant, boastful, or stuck up/
but my luck's up, it's fucked up, and i might just need to shut up/)
because the truth is that pessimism is a prison system/
identity crisis, in case you failed to listen/